Oh no you di'nt

Soo, I was doing my thing, floating about various systems, not doing much of anything... I headed to one of my hotspots for acquisition of tears or lols... otherwise known as Deepari, I try not to frequent the area too much so I don't draw attention to myself, but its not exactly a secret that I go there to shoot at whomever decides to present a target, be it from can flipping or general greifing.

I had all but become bored as the system was very quiet and not a lot was actually happening, when I stumbled across something which struck me as out of place...

An Augoror (logistic support ship) was apparently mining. More importantly, he was mining into a jet-can (putting the minerals he mines into an external container). Prime conditions for some can flip antics, In preparation for my attack, I do some basic research... firstly, how old is the toon... I discover he's nearly 6 years in game.

This smacks of some kind of trap. An Old character using an often overlooked ship doing something which is not a strong point of that ships design... its all too out of place.

I start to dig more, now expecting a counter attack from a prepared character deliberately undertaking actions which would entice opportune can flippers. I check eve-kill for his history, expecting a tirade of kills which could be related to such actions. Instead... I find...


nothing

I check battleclinic...


nothing


This toon is nearly 6 years old, and NEVER lost a ship? I don't think I of all people can allow someone that kind of grace, this is EVE ... everyone looses ships.

one swift refit later into a deliberately designed low cost Tornado, and back to Deepari I go, fully understanding that the cost of my loss is utterly ridiculous compared to the kill I'm about to undertake, but its the principle of the matter... no losses ... ever.. screw that, time to correct the matter.

and so, with a swift and deliberate strike from my 1400mm cannons his ship explodes, and local went a bit like this (while I was busy pissing myself with laughter):

The Watcher > my ship just got blown up
Zammo Bahrut > whoops
Zammo Bahrut > was that you ?
The Watcher > what happen?
The Watcher > i waz just minning
Zammo Bahrut > did you press the wrong button? [troll mode engaged ]
Melyor Le'line > Got canflipped I take it?
The Watcher > i see a glimps of a message about a worp block
The Watcher > and police
The Watcher > wooo gutting, had a good setup on that ship:(
 Melyor Le'line > Eh, CONCORD doesn't show up if you were "just mining"...
The Watcher > yeah, i have no idea what happen


to the unknowing 'The Watcher' character; I have no apologies, your combat record needed adjustment.

http://froot.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=12824921

ISK wars

Its fair to say that FROOT as a corp likes shiny things... sadly we don't much like it when we loose our shiny toys. Officially it gives us 'bad stats' on battleclinic and the likes, however, can't say that any of us actually give a crap about 'stats'.

Stats can be inflated quite easily, gate camps, suicide ganks and probably a dozen other ways to falsely polish the collective nerd-numbers.

While we are far from an epitome of good etiquette in EvE we do enjoy what we get up to, and when I see things such as the link below it makes me laugh. We don't have the shiny ships but one way or another a FROOT is waiting to kill your ship with whatever we have at our disposal. We pick our fights...

Utric.. this one surpasses your supreme pew-pew godlike abilities...

http://froot.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_related&kll_id=12725451

Dark Omens of things ahead.

Courtesy of Axloth Okiah:

I was getting my ninja on and hilarity ensued. I scanned two omens, warped to them in my heron and looted their wreck. They warped away and convoed me:

Phellanx > why did you steal from us?
Axloth Okiah > you just left it there
Mortos Soulstealer > we didnt even have time to loot it all before you got in
Phellanx > so you can choose
Axloth Okiah > choose what?
Phellanx > do you just want to give us 500k isk each or shall we just hunt you down?

they tried to bullshit me so i decided to bullshit them right back

Axloth Okiah > what?
Mortos Soulstealer > or a bounty
Phellanx > well we can hunt you down now, since you stole from us we can attack you :P we can also choose to put a bounty on you
Axloth Okiah > universe is big
Mortos Soulstealer > we wont have to hunt you if theres a bounty on your head
Axloth Okiah > do you want what i looted back?
Mortos Soulstealer > nah its just the principle of thing
Phellanx > nope, we just want you to pay us 500k isk each lol
Axloth Okiah > lol, what i looted is worth 4500isk
Axloth Okiah > im not gonna pay you 1mil
Phellanx > its the principle that you steal from us m8
Axloth Okiah > concord would shoot me if i did any crime
Axloth Okiah > and concord didnt, so its ok
Phellanx > you chose to steal from a player therefor we can kill you
Axloth Okiah > but you didnt
Phellanx > no but now we do want you dead, its still fun :P
Phellanx > or we can let you live if you pay us
Mortos Soulstealer > proof of how nice we are
Axloth Okiah > you are not nice, paying 1mil is crazy
Phellanx > either way, im pretty sure your ship is worth more than 1 mil isk
Phellanx > even with a platinum insurance
Axloth Okiah > its tech1 frigate
Axloth Okiah > it cost 160k
Mortos Soulstealer > stealing is crazy to
Phellanx > im wondering if you even have a clone at this point, would be a shame if your pod would be destroyed you know losing all your skill points and stuff
Mortos Soulstealer > you should know that......... you have been playing for a while
Axloth Okiah > you can kill my pod?
Phellanx > haha aye why do you think you have to buy clones lol
Mortos Soulstealer > we shouldnt have said that >.>
Phellanx > btw i wouldnt go near any bases now that theres a bounty on your head m8
Phellanx > big chance youll be shot down
Axloth Okiah > cowards
Phellanx > pay us 500k each and we'll take it down
Axloth Okiah > you are criminals, not me
Mortos Soulstealer > we are not the ones that stole from others
Axloth Okiah > blackmailing is worse than stealing
hellanx > right click our names and choose give money 500k

I jetted a can with the loot

Axloth Okiah > here is what i found
Phellanx > were giving you the easy way out
Axloth Okiah > now leave me alone
Mortos Soulstealer > mind abandoning it first?
Phellanx > you need to rigt click our names in next to the chat bar and choose give money
Axloth Okiah > what?
Phellanx > were not taking your cargo container m8 it would be noted as stealing as well haha
Mortos Soulstealer > hm.... you didnt abandon the container........ cant take it now..... would be stealing you know ;)
Axloth Okiah > its yours anyway
Phellanx > im getting tired of this
Axloth Okiah > i wont let you blackmail me

time to get all crazy and insane with rookie-bloodlust

Axloth Okiah > i would probably kill you two cowards even in my frigate
Phellanx > lol i could kill you by 1 of my drones
Axloth Okiah > what are you afraid off?
Axloth Okiah > my frig lol
Axloth Okiah > i will kill you with my heron
Mortos Soulstealer > just get your ass back here and abandon it...... it aint that hard
Axloth Okiah > and your pod
Mortos Soulstealer > death threat even from the criminal that stole
Axloth Okiah > you threatened me first
Phellanx > ok why dont you come back than see what happens
Mortos Soulstealer > because you stole from us
Mortos Soulstealer > doesnt matter how small you still stole
Axloth Okiah > i can afford second frigate

leeroy jenkins!!! uaaaa

Axloth Okiah > so im not affraid
Mortos Soulstealer > good for you
Phellanx > haha :P well were still putting a bounty on your head and when we know you got killed we'll put another one on
Axloth Okiah > come fight me cowards
Phellanx > ok come to asteroid belt 1
Axloth Okiah > you are not in the system even

Phellanx went to get warp disruptor

Mortos Soulstealer > i am
Axloth Okiah > i just bought a cruiser, i will kill you both now
Mortos Soulstealer > congratulations
Phellanx > ok come to asteroid belt 1 then in baviasi
Axloth Okiah > im in belt, come kill me
Axloth Okiah > 2 on 1?
Mortos Soulstealer > that is what you wanted right?

they jetted a can

Phellanx > take the item
Axloth Okiah > i dont want second bounty, you take mine
Axloth Okiah > i wont place bounty on you, i have no money left
Phellanx > just take it and lets get this over with
Axloth Okiah > i didnt have enough money to buy ammo to kill both of you
Axloth Okiah > i must kill you one by one
Axloth Okiah > you can pick who i kill first
Phellanx > take the item and you can attack me first since its my item
Axloth Okiah > ok, will mortos stayt out of it?
Phellanx > go ahead he wont attack
Axloth Okiah > you promise?
Mortos Soulstealer > ok

I took the can, Phellanx engaged me

Mortos Soulstealer > seems i wont even have to
Phellanx > sorry m8 you cant warp away

I killed his drones, scrammed him, neuted him and was going trough his armor, and the other guy attacked. Soon first exploded and I started working on the other one.

http://froot.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=12651429
http://froot.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=12651428

Axloth Okiah > that was fun guys
Axloth Okiah > thanks
Phellanx > now we will put a bounty on you for sure
Axloth Okiah > no prob ;)
Phellanx > to bad this game isnt fair haha
Axloth Okiah > 2v1 isnt fair, true

shhh ... the FROOT is sleeping

It's been REAAAAALY quiet in FROOT recently. Probably just me being on at the wrong time or some crap. I'm sure shit is getting done, but somehow not while I'm about...

I suspect that they're all spais and are trying to undertake a FRU-de-grace and usurp me their great and wonderous leader!

Endy's Erstwhile Excellent Embroilment

Endy, to help overcome eve-burnout, decided that we needed some corp action which would involve as many as possible, so he settled on the idea of a lowsex friggy roam. Cheap cheerful carefree combat was the aim of the game. A worthy cause, one which reinvigorates peoples love or loathing of Eve Online.

So, a date, time and place were set...

Axloth was on, chatting on the FROOTspeak ... Chas was hanging around and even Melf showed up for some lol-sec fun times, I as always was mooching about generally doing nothing (see also: being a carebear of extraordinary cary-beary-ness). But where was Endy?

Nope, we waited a while... and no Endymi, so being that I am by far and excluding none, one of the single greatest leaders of men ever to grace the game of Eve Online I began organising the fleet. Rifters... check, Punisher, yup.. Kestral ... ok it wasnt pretty but it was our elite pvp fleet.

We headed out of Amarr into Ami lowsec, roaming northward (Without Endy ... did I mention he didn't turn up?) and excluding a lot of very boring and empty systems, we chased a few lone people, only catching up with a lone drake hugging a gate like it was his childhood 'blanky' Its surpriseing just how scary four tech 1 frigs must appear to be...

Ignoring the boring systems... In part because of the dullness of these systems and at my choice we found a local faction rat for some ISKs, Utric pushed it one further and we ran an anomaly in our shitty frigs, we were reaching that pinnacle point at which boredom begins to set in and the fleet starts doing crazy shit just because. In this case, It meant warping to a cyno, which was on a station, and then attempting to 'ransom' the Archon that undocked. The Archon pilot clearly didn't see the funny side of this and got all grumpy in local chat then docked up.

HOWEVER .... while we were all pissing about laughing at this general shenanigans, a rupture had warped to the station. Upon trying to lock him, he warped away to a gate... so we followed, we had broken the rule of Eve ... super serious internet spaceships. At this point we could in no way be considered to be in a serious mood and suicide seemed like the best way to bring things to a head.

Not wanting gate aggro, he dropped a can. Utric, not giving a single fuck, took it. Utric called engaged... (although he hadn't actually fired...) so I as FC yelled to all engage. At that point no great surprise really .. oh look a blob of death jumping through, Utric jumped through... and away to safety.. I called to GTFO chas did like a good boy and ran the hell away. The rest of us died.

In the ensuing laughter over teamspeak while smacking in local about their  requirement to use a fleet of high end stuff to take out some frigates... I check the Killboards. 

The result? we WON (in terms of isk ...)

Somehow, the rupture pilot had died to gate gun fire. This meant that, as we had caused the aggro, it got tallied to our kills!

oh Fabulous!

What an interesting time we've had... Utric doing his normal thing of shooting anything that doesn't have the tag 'Utric' at the start of it found some people that were in need of some pew pew power.

In so far as he'd shot at them, and then got chatting we decided that in the best interest of lolz and tears we'd join them to go and shoot at some other poor saps. It was to be many epic lolz we would as one FROOTy force join the alliance and bring forth our own special 'who gives a shit attitude' to their war. In essence... To crush our enemies -- See them driven before us, and to hear the lamentation of their CEO!


In true FROOT style, no sooner had we arranged this than my inbox flashed with an incomming and completely unrelated (well ... unrelated to the war in question, but still at the root cause that is Utric101 ... god I love that guy sometimes)


and so, from the dust raises an old sparing partner 'Galatic Rangers' ... 


sorry did I misstype their name? this should rectify that:

So to spoil our own little griefing party these nut rubbers now have FROOT well and truely backpeddling. Poor Chas lost a Geddon after a 4 hour POS bash, he was heading home and promptly had his vessel removed from around him by several of these lovey space-turds ... a 2 Bhaalgorn fleet with support stomped all over his poor Geddon, we saw fit to get retribution for the kill. but this is gonna be tricky with those 2 space-tampons flying around neuting everything.


So. Rangers... if you got issue with Utric, ask him for a 1v1 ... I'm sure he'd love to quite frankly tho, we both know this war will end up played out mostly inside of a station. Yay for high-sec wars. 

Not this crap again...

Well what a day ..

After much deliberation about how best we as a corp should go about doing stuff, I decided to pump ISK into my ever waning wallet.. care bear mode... Engage!

but no sooner than I put agent to journal and begun turning the grind wheel I get rudely interrupted by a girl band from the early 90's  ... well, their namesake anyway.

TLC, a group of wormhole bullies that we keep having little run-in's with, quite rudely they decided to try and once again extract ISK from our tightly clenched fists, with Chasman defending us in the form of a stiff talking to their guys... after some billy big bollocks nonsense from them, they eventually ... did nothing more than flinging a few bombs at the POS defences and then left, that sure showed us.

So, the point remains, I'm poorer than I should be, the corp is ticking over nicely and we're still being picked on by anyone that comes our way, sounds pretty much like normal state of affairs.



Oh... and our noob put me sorely in my place... Decon, I'm gonna fall in love with you if you carry on like this, but I am supremely jealous.

http://froot.eve-kill.net/?a=kill_detail&kll_id=12331351